'The role of a writer is not to say what we all can say, but what we are unable to say'. - Anais Nin. These words (unless otherwise stated) are all formed within my brain and somehow executed to form this journal.
Whoever said' love is all you ever need - love alone is enough' I think They lied. Love alone is never enough.
It wasn't enough to restore the betrayal - he betrayed me and no amount of love can erase the betrayal. Call it what you may, but love wasn't enough to stop betrayal and love for me wasn't enough to stay. - Self respect was worth more than the love I had for him. The love alone simply wasn't enough.
Going on like this, constantly questioning why his morals didn't line up with mine, why I wasn't enough he had to look elsewhere. Even if he said it had stopped, and I loved him so much..... I didn't feel safe. And there's enough uncertainty in this world - your partner shouldn't be that also.live wasn't enough. Love was all we had left when everything else fell apart. But it wasn't enough.
And then there was him, His love for his inheritance was greater than his love for me- those things made him who he was... Love added joy but it didn't change the reality he 'enjoyed' expensive toys and lots of them. Why would I (me, who finds the greatest joy walking around barefoot and wearing flowers in my hair, who prefers bicycles to porsches, bare feet to louboutins, a warehouse to a glass mansion) why would i fall for someone who treasured these things?
Believe me I've asked myself this question since the second I realized I loved him, more than loved him, was head over bare feet in love with him, and was even prepared to 'think' about sacrificing everything i had for this love- I asked myself why? I don't know, all I know was I loved him, And i believe he loved me but it also wasn't enough. Not for him to trade in all his toys. And not for i. I couldn't sacrifice my core beliefs and values - not even in the name of love. Even if he had sacrificed all his expensive toys - It wasn't a fair trade. Again LOVE alone - wasn't enough.
She loved him more than life itself, she said her vows and he said his,I'll support and encourage you till I die, but when times got tough he crumbled under the pressure and she got no support, love or encouragement - she too crumbled. But they were in love, they still are, but it's not enough to keep them together because life isn't just sitting in bed reading books and singing sweet lullabies to one another - there's children and families and hobbies and friends and jobs to factor in... And once you add all this to love, it makes it messy and complicated and stressful and the love you initially had fades into the background as you disagree on schools, friends, and values and beliefs.. Love alone never is never enough. The dizziness eventually fades, the butterflies, they disappear and love, if it's not rooted on core values that align, common interests and the ability to accept someone as they are -not part of them, BUT all of them and not hope to change them, that too eventually fades out and you're left knowing and wondering why love itself wasn't enough! Even bitter and cold and angry at love when all along it wasn't him or you or the lack of love, it simply was that it wasn't enough alone....that four letter word, LOVE, it just wasn't enough.
